Please Help! Protect Our Children

I watched a Special Investigation segment on ABC News Nightline last night.  Just in case you don't believe what I'm about to post, here is the link for you to watch for yourselves.

Deadly Discipline? Students Hurt, Dying After Being Restrained

There are actually school systems (administrators and teachers) that not only approve of, but are actually encouraging torturing our children.  Physical and psychological abuse.  And then saying it's to "protect them from hurting themselves or others."

Worst of all?  These procedures are being practiced on Special Needs Kids such as those with Autism.

Such tactics are to include:

1.  Electric Shock Therapy
2.  Being physically restrained
3.  Being locked in "Seclusion Rooms"

Let's take the first.  Imagine 60 volts of electricity coursing through YOUR body!  And they are doing this to our children!  The young teenager in this video is held down as he SCREAMS and struggles to get away from the electric current.  I cried.  I just can't think of anything to say to this.  They are electrocuting him.

The Second:  Being Physically Restrained.  Tell me how you would react if you discovered your child or teenager lying on the floor with between 1 and 6 grown men lying on TOP of him.  Supposedly these men acted according to procedure.  The young man DIED.  Tell me how that is "Acceptable Procedure."

Third:  Seclusion Rooms.  These are small "pods" that are windowless, dark, and have padded walls so the child will not hurt himself.  I don't know about you, but I wouldn't like being locked in a pitch black room for HOURS.  Not minutes, HOURS.  Completely alone in the dark.  The "room" wasn't even that big.  It gives me nightmares to think about.

I don't see how ANY of these would help.  It all seems to me like it would make a bad situation ten times worse.  These children are already angry, and this will make them angrier, terrified, and LESS likely to cooperate.

This is Inhuman.

This is Cruel.

This is Torture.

If I did any of the above to my children, I would be arrested, tried, and convicted of child abuse and child endangerment.  And Rightfully So!  So why is it perfectly LEGAL for a teacher or school administrator to engage in this!  Not only is it LEGAL, school systems are ENCOURAGING THIS!!!

 This is an abomination.

Fortunately, there is legislation in Congress to prohibit most of this.  Please contact your Congressman to help support this legislation.  S.2860 - Preventing Harmful Restraint and Seclusion in Schools Act
We need this passed to protect our children.  ALL of our children. PLEASE Help me STOP this.  I can't do it alone.  I need anyone and everyone to help raise our voices so that we can be heard.

If WE don't protect our children, Nobody will.

For a Child's Sake, Please Help.

WOW.......It's Been A While

I just looked back and realized, WOW....It's been a while since I posted.  At least a couple of months.  Things have been busy.  My last post dealt with my baby graduating Pre-School, and my oldest getting his 2nd Grade Awards.  They are growing up so fast.

Now the summer is almost over.  M. starts Kindergarten this fall.  He's going to ride the school bus with his brother.  I'm hoping that Z. will look out for his brother in one of those Only-I-As-His-Big-Brother-Can-Beat-Him-Up ways and not let anyone else torture him.  I'm hoping.  With my luck (and M's) Z and his friend will gang up on M together.  *Sigh*  I can only hope.  And pray.

M is excited about riding the school bus with his brother and going to big school.  If you ask him what school he's going to attend this fall, he'll tell you "My brother's school."  I don't think it has quite sunk in yet that it will be his school, too, now.  Z, on the other hand, is looking forward to being the Big Man on Campus and instructing his little brother in just exactly how things are done.  I believe this will last until the first time they run into each other in the hallway, or lunchroom, or playground.  M will run up to hug his brother, and Z will look at him like he has no idea who this little runt is glued to him.  *Sigh*

I have mixed emotions.  On one hand, I'm really looking forward to plugging that financial leak that has been daycare and babysitters.  And I'm proud of my boys growing up.  But part of me already misses those rides to town in the morning when M and I would talk about what game he was playing on his DS, or what movie he was watching in the backseat, or just why he didn't want me talking to his teachers after school that day.  (Yeah, that was a "good" day - but it was funny!)

My boys aren't babies anymore.  Z is as tall as my shoulder at only 8.  M is fast catching up.  I don't know if they're growing that fast, or if I'm shrinking.  Probably both.

But no matter how tall they grow, or what grade they are in school -- as all mothers know -- they will always, Always, ALWAYS be my Babies.  Period.  End of Story.

Growing Up Is HARD........on Mom

Yesterday, my two sons had milestones.....and so did I.  They enjoyed themselves very much.  Me?  Not so much.

My oldest son, Z, had his Parent Picnic and Awards Day at school.  He made Honor Roll for the year (Yay, Z!!!!!) and earned over 70 points in his Accelerated Reader Program -- one of the highest in his class.  I am so very proud of him.  And though he clearly got his brains from me, I was still a little sad.  My boy is growing up. Fast.  He is only 8, yet he already reaches my shoulder.  Granted, the basketball teams in school were never beating down my door (or even knocking, for that matter), but still.  He shouldn't really be that tall.....should he?

Watching Z wasn't so difficult though.  He quit giving me hugs and kisses in public over 5 years ago.  He has grown independent and really is turning into a little man.  He loves to build things and show them off to me -- and I am always suitably impressed -- but he never wants me to help anymore.  He doesn't want me to read bedtime stories to him.  I'm still a part of his world, just not an active part.  And I haven't really been for a while, so though I brushed back a couple tears during the slide show at the end of awards, I really came through it okay.

Last night was a completely different situation.  M graduated from Pre-Kindergarten school.  He dressed up in big boy clothes -- pull-over shirt and khakis -- and had on his cap and gown.  All of a sudden, he wasn't my baby anymore.  Who is this little boy?  Wait! Where is my baby?!?!? NOOOOOooooooooooo, this CAN'T be him!  He's 5.  He still crawls in my lap to give me hugs and kisses -- and he still fits!  He loves on me anytime and anywhere, and sometimes it's even his idea.  He still wants bedtime stories (though I'm beginning to suspect it's to delay bedtime more than wanting time with me) and occasionally even lets me rock him.  I bawled like the baby M is still supposed to be.  He walked across that stage, got his diploma and his "Imagination Award" (very apt, I promise you!) like he owned the place.  I cried more.

Z is my oldest, and though it was hard, it was not THIS hard.  I think.  The distraction of his brother who would have been 2 at the time kept me from dwelling on just how fast all of this happened.  M, though, is the baby.  No more distractions.  No more of these events will be happening.  He is my last one.  I'm trying to write all of this down so that I won't forget anything. I write it down to help myself adjust to how fast my boys are growing up.

One little man.  One little boy.  Neither of them so "little" anymore.  What's a mom to do?

Then M came running up to me, gave me a hug, and went running off to race his brother up and down the halls (despite my admonishments not to run inside), and suddenly he was my baby again.  I got a reprieve.  But this fall, when they both climb on that big yellow school bus -- one to 3rd grade and one to Kindergarten -- I make no promises.  Yes, I do.  I promise I will cry all the way to work.  Or maybe I'll follow the bus all the way to school . . . . . . .even if it is the opposite direction from work.

Teaching Children

As I'm sure I've posted before, manners are important to me.  I was raised to show respect and behave with manners in all situations.  You say "sir" and "ma'am" and "please," "thank you," and "excuse me."  You ALWAYS, and I mean ALWAYS address people with respect.  My husband and I are doing our best to instill this in our children.  They have lapses:  responding with "what?" when called; answering "yeah" when asked a question; but generally, they behave well -- especially when they are AWAY from us.

(Why do kids behave better away from parents?  But, if they are going to act up, I would rather it be with me, than with other people!  Anyway, I stray)

Which is why I was stunned when Z came home from school yesterday on Orange for being "disrespectful to another teacher."  What?  Z?  Oh, no!  I never did get the details, but I know he disobeyed a teacher, and continued to ignore instructions from said teacher.  Now I cannot allow this behavior.

Z got four licks with the paint stick.  Good licks.  Attention-getting licks.  I also made him write sentences since he said he didn't know the teacher's name and couldn't write an apology letter.  (He disrespected a teacher he doesn't even know?!?!?  The news just gets worse!)  I told him to write "I'm sorry I was disrespectful to you." on every other line of the front page of a piece of paper.  (The funny part is he evidently didn't know what "every other" meant, so he wrote the sentence down two-thirds of the page, but that's okay with me.  It helped send the message home. )  I also told him if he saw that teacher today, to apologize to her in person.  Maybe a little humility will help, too.

And then I wrote a note to his teacher detailing his punishment.  I want to make sure she know that this behavior will NOT be tolerated.  Not by me or my husband.  He is taught better.  He knows better.

All of the above was fine, right?  Necessary, right?  I am responsible for teaching my children right from wrong.  I am responsible for doling out punishment when they misbehave so that they know their actions have consequences.  Rewards and Punishments are part of teaching.  Right?

So why did I spend the next two hours trying not to cry because I had to spank my child?  Why did it upset me so much?  Part of it was disappointment, I know.  I thought we were past this part with Z.  I thought he had already learned this lesson.  Actually, I know he has.  So why did he behave so badly?  Why was he disrespectful toward an adult?  A teacher?  And why did I fight back tears?  I guess because I don't like punishing him.  He is a good boy.  He is a fine young man.  Most of the time.

Well, he got his reminder to behave himself, be polite, show respect.  And Mom got a reminder on what it's like to punish the kids since Dad's out of town and he normally does that.  I didn't much like it.  But I'm pretty sure Z didn't like it much either.  So we both learned something.  At least, I did.  I hope Z did, because I really don't want to do that again.

*sigh* Being a responsible parent really stinks sometimes!